I bought banana’s some days ago…for my mono banana. I snacked on banana’s with other things. I mentioned mono chocolate…..and found myself eating banana with chocolate. A very nice combo I must add….kinda like a year ago when on low carb…….Atkins chocolate low carb milk shake goes well with subway cookies. Or years ago during my teen years and when Richard Simmons  was still kinda popular….he had this meal a deal where you slide down the portion you ate. In the little booklet he had this sweet treat recipe that was calorie friendly. In  nut shell a strawberry short cake and instead of one….I had …five..???

Its so sad I feel I have to return back to purging. I can’t handle food. So much going on a full time job, full time schooling and tired. Ad deep down I do hate purging. I’m not rich and wasting food is hard to do, but the foods I buy tend to be cheap…but still.

So many diets exist, so many work, but problem is sticking to them. Its hard to stick to diets. I was thinking today that if given one more chance to be thin I would’t ruin it. Being fat it seems a long ways to go.

So much on my mind….



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