Getting my thoughts together.

Been thinking all day how to quit my job and how to get hired elsewhere asap. My favorite co-workers are like don’t quit….when they too want to quit. Being a cna you are a maid, slave, therapist, who happens to earn a wage. I think its best I go PRN….which I been thinking of doing long before and find a part time job or more ideal a full time job somewhere in retail, medical (like drawing blood…hard to get, but still worth a try), I need to work somewhere …..more positive compared to a nursing home. Somewhere not so needy for attention where customers come and go and don’t stay and get mad at someone only wanting to brighten up their day. PRN means I show up when their short or someone calls out. I won’t have to be there daily and get so stressed out by residents where I can easily cope with them since I won’t be there. Since I been there seven aides have already quit. Two quit after being there three days, one recently quit after four months,the other four quit during the day shift. Slowly I’m seeing new aides and no longer seeing the aides I would see on my shift or leaving before I start mines.

Today was my day off and I return on the 13th. I will see what they say and what they plan on doing to me. I will give them a notice of going PRN sometime this week or maybe I should wait to get a new job offer….but what if that new job wants me now? And I can’t give them that weeks notice, so then I lose the PRN for a little extra income now and then.

I slept most of the day and when I finally woke up fully. I had one miss call and three text messages,and one voicemail from my former co-worker already talking about whats going on at her nursing home….when she told me yesterday when I needed someone the most (anyone) told me I know how it is…and pretty much in a nutshell she was really saying let it go. When for four years I heard her complain about the nursing home, D.O.N, co-workers,residents, ect. without brushing her off. I always listened. Or agree that it was wrong…for me time to move on.

So after playing her voice mail, reading the messages, and seeing the missed call. I wasn’t going to entertain how she feels and what she is going through since it really doesn’t matter what I’m going through. I knew how to end it. I text back that what happened at her job is typical nursing home drama nurse vs. aide and right now I’m feeling really down now. I also included that after what I went through my feelings are a normal human emotion (my way of saying save the your going crazy talk or you get too stressed out fast and let everyone get under your skin…somehow for her its ok to feel bad or upset)

After I text that I didn’t hear from her anymore today, so she got the message.

As long as things make her the focus its ok. The times I make myself the focus …I don’t really hear from her as often.

I don’t mind people talking about themselves since it kills a boring convo, but the times I want a listening ear I shouldn’t be cut off.

Late tonight….well yesterday night since its 12:12am now. I went to walmart where I fit in with the average shopper. Not many are lookers if you know what I mean. I felt like I was only existing. Got a six inch meat ball sub that taste like dog food. I didn’t have a subway sandwich in months and because I was so hungry because I haven’t eaten yet I thought why not?

I only ate half the sub and couldn’t believe two years ago I would buy a foot long meat ball sub with mayo,honey mustard, lettuce and tomato. The meat taste gross, only the baked lays were worth it.

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2 Responses to “Getting my thoughts together.”

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  2. ebonnie Says:

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