I want to eat so badly that my foot has been fidgeting for the past two hours. 317 pounds and no Krispy Kreme job yet.

Last week I found out looking better then when I applied for the job….that the call I got was a huge mistake! I was shocked and I mean he said my name, dialed my number and told me to come in. The hiring manager was a woman. Asked me for my name and she said she never had called me 😦  I sat there feeling awful. She told me to go ahead and stay. I sat there as other people were interviewed as I gazed out the window and ease dropping on the interviews. I snacked on a apple pie doughnut to numb my emotions and help pass the time giving me a small sugar happy feeling. I talked to one who was waiting her turn for her interview and she was nice.

Would you believe I passed interview part one? …..only because they were desperate since no wants to come in 3-4am in the morning and im desperate for A job again A job. Since I’m a bus/train rider I will have to wait somewhere in the dark three hours before my shift starts since transportation doesn’t run 24/7.

I was told I have to do another interview with someone else. Part two interview. In my mind I’m thinking this is not a high paying job or anything dealing with corporate why two interviews just to make donuts? So she talked with the other manager (because the same person can’t interview you) he agreed for me to interview with him next week.


Yesterday was the next week (April 16th 2014) I get dressed, make up check, double check myself in the mirror and off I went. Rushing and hurrying off, catching my breath. I did my best to hurry up three flights of stairs for the train after a 20 min walk (short cut included) to the train station. I breathed so hard I made sure to wait in the corner away from other people because three flights of stairs makes me breath so hard it seems like I’m dying and people stare.

I get there in only a few minutes. I hurry inside and I let them know I am here for interview two!

I was told that she would be right with me (she?? …) and to go ahead and take a seat.

I sit down surrounded by glaze,colorful, pretty little things called donuts. The smell of donuts was breath taking.

My interview was 1:30pm I came in at 1:29 on the dot!

I waited…..customers came in and order, then no customers in sight I sat there waiting…waiting…..1:45pm.

The girl told me that the one who was suppose to interview me quit in the spot Sunday! He had only been working there two weeks. My jaw almost hit the floor! I thought wow…ok so will she interview me again for part two I was thinking :/

She said she can’t since I was interviewed by her last time.

She told me to wait and asked if I’m willing to come back maybe after 5pm for another supervisor to interview me since the manager had quit.

I said sure. So she called him no answer…she texted…no answer from him. She told me to wait a minute and off she went back behind the counters as I waited for this person to call/text her back to see what we can do.

2pm….I’m sitting there all done up. Fighting the urge to request five donuts without shame. I started day dreaming of forcing myself back there and munching on all the donuts I wanted until I was arrested. The longer I had to wait the more I wanted to eat, I caught myself several times chewing on my nails,fidgeting, looking around feeling stupid.

I thought to myself when the man quit Sunday why didn’t anyone call me? Why didn’t on Monday she talked to the supervisor telling him I was coming on Wed can he interview me instead? Then call me and tell me of any changes? Instead I rushed to a interview that never happened, I came on time and sat there past the hour.  Why not just skip part two interview and get me on the pay roll and lets get started? At least think she came, she waited so long let her have the job.

One of the workers ask me whats going on? She saw me come 1:30pm, I sat there and next minute it was 2:40pm. I got up from my seat. Yes I’m fat,but I can’t sit long and I had to use the bath room. I went to use their bath room and door was locked. I was about to ask for a key and thought forget this and told the worker to tell the manager that I’m really ok coming in next time!

She did and came back and told me she said she will call me next week. She was nice and told me to make sure I call if I don’t hear from anyone (no joke). The two ladies working there were nice and already seem to like me and said everyone gets along here.

So the saga continues.


Its 1:28am now and I’m still fidgeting (laying down typing essay for school and now blogging)

I’m going to force myself to sleep since the longer I stay up the more powerful it is to eat.

Like old times…………back in fetal position and think happy thoughts that don’t include food.


Three days ago scale read 325, today 317. So sad, but if I don’t stop it now…




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2 Responses to “I want to eat so badly that my foot has been fidgeting for the past two hours. 317 pounds and no Krispy Kreme job yet.”

  1. PReuter Says:

    Are you doing okay? I haven’t heard from you on this site in quite a while. I’ve never commented before, but I read pretty much all of your entries and often felt the urge to reach out to you… but now that you’ve been absent for quite some time (I noticed you’ve done this before, but I’m a late-comer to your blog) I just want to know how you’re doing, if you want someone to talk to, etc.

  2. ebonnie Says:

    Hi, and yes I been gone some time. I been feeling too down and been feeling down lately. Busy job hunting before its too late (rent wise) and can’t help to think that only a year and a half ago I was happier before being laid off, smaller in size, and it seemed life coming together. Now it feels like its falling apart. I been thinking about my blog sometimes, but because of you (the reminder) I will return blogging more. I think I will create one early this morning (1:17am now).
    But much thanks for reaching out. Who knew I had anyone reading really lately.

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