Yesterday I was 258.6, now im 259…..

Yesterday I screamed after years of being 260 something or more I ended up in the 50’s I didn’t know what to do! I did my diet like always…..caved in to a slice of cake from whole foods and a personnel pan pizza from pizza hut and 5am I woke up to 259.0 from 258.6.

I always weigh before work aka 5am and after work 4-6pm.

This morning 259.0 I was like well at least I enjoyed my cake and still in my 50’s.

Now its 5:43pm my time and now I weight 260.4. Meaning tomorrow I will be 259.something.

I had three atkin shakes which were 160 in calories each, one at 5am, another at 9am then 10am, then a slice of pizza and after work two cups of water melon and a coke zero. All that for sure is 1200-1300 calories. More then what I been eating calorie wise, but hopefully I can do this for a moment.

Mini goal be 255 pounds, bigger goal get in my 240’s!!!! I would feel too hot at 240 lol.

Co-workers both male and female were making comments about my weight , all were amazed and proud of me….proud!!!! Some tried to quickly glance me up and down (like I wouldn’t notice) and pretend they were not looking. Im enjoying the feed back and attention, but I would enjoy it way more if I knew I had my first v- date in Feb.

I got the best positive compliment ever today a long one saying how Im doing so much better ect. and Im able to walk faster and she is still shocked I out walked her….I understand shes like a size 6 me a 18.

I just told myself don’t get too comfortable or its back to for sure 60’s…then 70’s and then everyone for sure will be like what the hell happened to her?

My assistant manager has been giving tons of space. More helpful ect. She saw I ignored her , but shes gotten better for now…I still will write anything that she or anyone does out of hand. And will try to get a witness to sign too. I come in for a pay check not to deal with anyones off the wall behavior.

Im not eating anymore today and for once I i’m feel on my way.

In Feb Im going to visit family….can I be a size 16 by then???? Or wishful thinking….time will tell.

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2 Responses to “Yesterday I was 258.6, now im 259…..”

  1. Corner of Confessions Says:

    Congratulations! Whats most important is not the number, but how you are feeling emotionally and physically. Sure we are judged by size, but alot of the time the judgement is on the confidence level as well. You are coming out of shell already and that’s whats really going to change your life and your interactions with others.

    But i’m glad you are HAPPY. That is what i really worry about and wish the most for you… simple happiness.

    And girlie pizza??? Pizza hut pizza is like 300-500 calories a SLICE. with alot of grams of fat and all that stuff that is bad for you. It’s better than pizzeria pizza which is 1000 calories a slice. But save these types of food as your “treat’ or reward for occasionally indulging in. For the diet try sticking to fresh whole foods and trust me you will see a difference in your energy level and i know the scale is important to you you will see a difference there too.

    If you keep up this determination, i have no doubt you can reach a size 16!

  2. ebonnie Says:

    Awww thank you!
    I believe confidence is delevoped through positive words and treatment, BUT I have talked to obese or over weight women who have tons of confidence, but still treated like second rate. I do agree confidence is good for some things. I just seen growing up a anorexic pal of mines who self cut and said she was ugly get better treatment then me (no joke).

    I mean I have people who really never talked to me start talking and starting convo themselves! Its like in their eyes Im becoming more interesting due to my weight loss.
    The number shouldn’t matter, but Im so ready for someday to wear a two piece bathing suit, veins, and sagging skin and all!

    Yes pizza….it was so good I forced myself to not get another one.
    1000 calorie slice of pizza and people buy that? I never heard such a high slice. Must be bacon, cheese, and more cheese, ect on top.

    And thanks again I want happiness too.

    But really its like I been working there and yes many kind people exist at my job and what not, but for the first time by these girls I was told hi and good bye and they talked to me!

    I do have more confidence I will admit that only because people are allowing me to be confident. Im still huge, but seems there are people who love when a large person lose weight and not fans of the pro plus size group…..but if they see you trying and losing at the same time they seem to respect you more.

    I will try that for energy makes sense if you eat better you should have soaring enegry!

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